frozen pizzas

[PizzaPolice]

Brokencookie

As a child, did you walk to school or carry you lunch?
You're kinking my brain, dude.

[asudavew]

Originally Posted by PizzaPolice

Well.. I imagine that your frozen pizza will thaw around the edges first, in about 40 seconds. Next, the center will become warm & gummy. One minute 20 seconds; As the edges start to brown up, you'll see the pizza smoke a bit. You'll think the edges are the cause. NOPE. The bottom has just become involved. The sugar & oil in the commercial dough has just met it's smoking point and is now starting to char. Your frozen pepperonis are a little sweaty now and you think.. ..Hmmm another few minutes. Of course, you will be wrong and the whole thing will suddenly heave, bend, twist and spit. You'll exclaim some appropriate phrases such as "what the..." "holy sh...." Hopefully, in this one minute fifty-five second venture, you'll have gathered the sense not to throw water on the now fire engulfed former pizza and merely scoop it up with peel and deposit it on the coal bank

That absolutely cracked me up!

[PizzaJNKY]

Well Frances, I actually did bake the frozen pizza's in the WFO oven, and based on the experience, I believe the pizza police was speaking from experience. I was cooking at about 900, so they were not in the oven that long..just long enough to do some of things pizza police mentioned. I actually had to keep them right next to the oven opening to prevent a pizza explosion.

My appologies to the WFO-Gods if it was a crime to cook frozen pizzas in my oven, but my kids were so excited to see dad cooking in an oven that took a little over 2-months to build. The looks of excitement on their faces was priceless, and they loved the pizza too, so it was worth it.

By the way, in light of some of the responses in this thread, I should have put it in the humor room.

[brokencookie]

Originally Posted by PizzaPolice

Brokencookie

As a child, did you walk to school or carry you lunch?
You're kinking my brain, dude.

Both !!
what fun is a brain if you can't take it out for a walk or play with it ?

Bruce

[PizzaPolice]

Son, you've been out with lone pines too long. Put on a hat and get out of the sun.

[BrianShaw]

Originally Posted by PizzaJNKY

My appologies to the WFO-Gods if it was a crime to cook frozen pizzas in my oven...

Once upon a time, gods really appreciated burnt offerings!

[Frances]

If the kids liked it, I'm sure the pizza gods will be lenient, and will accept the offering in the spirit it was meant...

[gjbingham]

Tears and giggles. Funny funny thread!

Bruce- I take my brain out and play with it all the time. It just sits there on the counter and contemplates life while I flop around on the floor convulsing.

Frances - Are you going to make us research the unamended version of Terry Pratchett's quote. I think it might be a bit more off-color. Come on! Give it up!

JNKY - the gods are very forgiving. Someone did Pilsbury type cinamon rolls from a can not too long ago. What the hell! All good fun.

[Frances]

...what, no one here reads Terry Pratchett??!

[jwnorris]

Originally Posted by Frances

...what, no one here reads Terry Pratchett??!

Well, I don't know about the others, but I had not heard of Terry. So it was off to the internet and Wikipedia for some research. Not it's off the the book store.

It is fitting, knowing the twisted minds of some of us here, that he holds the record for the most shoplifted author in Britain.

J W