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Dairy farmer - Forno Bravo Forum: The Wood-Fired Oven Community



Photo Galleries are back! Instructions below.

Dear forum users,
Thank you for your patience with the Photo galleries. We've got your galleries online!
We have finished writing a custom script to migrate the PhotoPlog to vBulletin5’s albums.

Unfortunately V-Bulletin killed the "Photoplogs" in their software upgrade which was unforeseen and we're the first development group to have written a script for getting the galleries back... that said, it took some time to reverse engineer the code and get the albums to move over seamlessly!

Forum users will be able to access their “PhotoPlog” images through their user profile page by clicking on the “Media” tab.
They will also be able to browse other albums by going to the albums page. (On the forum site, there is a link in the black bar beside “Forums” to the albums.)

In order for users to create an album please follow the steps below.
1) Go to user profile page and click “Media”
2) Click Add Photos
3) Enter Photo Gallery Title in the first field
4) Click Upload or Select from Photo Album to add photos
5) Click Post
6) Once posted, the album will be created as a “Topic” on the albums page for the public to see. The topic title will be the “Photo Gallery Title” they created before uploading their photos.

To create this migration path we used vBulletin5’s default album structure. Unfortunately, it won’t work like the “PhotoPlog” but is an album/gallery component on the forum now.
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Dairy farmer

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  • Dairy farmer

    A dairy farmer was herding his cows in a remote pasture when suddenly
    brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.

    The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses

    and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the farmer;

    "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will

    you give me a calf?"

    The farmer looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his

    peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

    The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it

    to his AT&T cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he

    calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his

    location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area

    in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

    The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it

    to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

    Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has

    been processed and the data stored.

    He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel

    spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives

    a response.

    Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech,

    miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the farmer and says;

    "You have exactly 1586 cows and calves."

    "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the


    He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as

    the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

    Then the farmer says to the young man;

    "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back

    my calf?"

    The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

    "You're a consultant" says the farmer.

    "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

    "No guessing required." answered the farmer.

    "You showed up here even though nobody called you;

    you want to get paid for an answer I already knew,

    to a question I never asked;

    and you don't know anything about my business........

    Now give me back my dog."

  • #2
    Re: Dairy farmer

    Yeh, I like it.
    It is certainly reminiscent of the yuppy set who think they know it all but know very little when compared to a well experienced down to earth person.

    Prevention is better than cure, - do it right the first time!

    The more I learn, the more I realise how little I know

    Neill’s Pompeiii #1
    Neill’s kitchen underway


    • #3
      Re: Dairy farmer

      Switch the BMW for a company supplied Ford Explorer and you have a story about my boss. Has all the gadgets, all of the data, thinks he has all of the answers (which I provided), but no idea how to use it all to grow our business.